Chantrelle

Chantrelle is the name of a lovely autumnal forest mushroom, growing in abundance here on Endor, a lush, richly fertile, magnificently wooded rain forest.
Chantrelle is also the name of the beautiful French village girl.

I found a recipe from Giada. It was for a raw mushroom salad. I asked Chantrelle if she wanted to try it and she said something in French, but I didn't know what she meant by it. She was too busy texting to respond appropriately. I have always been a proponent of mushroom, and over the years, I've come to know many, and I have cultivated an appreciation for all. Here on Endor, with the crisp change of seasons comes the woodsy harvest of these prized mushrooms, flaxen trumpets of fall. I guess people are trufflin' right now this time of year too. I gots to get into that, but I have always thought I needed a pig. But, you don't. Then yesterday I heard about the micro pigs. And that wasn't good, because Chantrelle really wants one or five. And not because she's into truffles. So, I told Chantrelle that with the national economic downturn, things were looking troublesome for me and for the blog, and that we'd have to sell the replica General Lee I had purchased, the one from the television series Dukes of Hazzard. Chantrelle loved that car.

This cold mushroom salad concept has a significant measure of appeal. The flavor of a mushroom is very nuanced for me, and it is difficult to articulate the gustatory experience because of the complexity created, I think most importantly, by the environment in which they grow. How do you describe earthiness? Because these mushrooms taste like anything but dirt. These have rich, subtle, lavish flavors.
Chantrelle enjoys them sauteed in butter and not much else.

I bought button mushrooms, chantrelle mushrooms, Parmesan cheese, a lemon, and used some decent olive oil for this, and some shallots and parsley. I sliced the mushrooms thinly, working to creates sheets out of the stems. And this is too easy, because all you have to do next is finely chop the parsley, ditto for shallots, mix them up with the mushrooms and some lemon juice (to taste), and then shave some Parmesan on the top and salt and pepper the salad. Go lite on the liquid and a little heavy with oil, as it coats the mushroom easier. I was very judicious with my seasoning also because these flavors, are naturally strong, and the salty undertone substance provided by the Parmesan complement this perfectly. Chop really finely, I always work for translucent. Time consuming but worth it every time. It's dual purpose is to allow main ingredients, mushrooms in this case, to stand up. But, I stepped away a moment ago, and have turned my attention completely to vampires right now. Do you have any thoughts on vampires? Because I do, frequently, and always have, and I just watched a funny show this afternoon that kept mentioning vampires. Daywalkers are the spookiest.

My affection for Giada makes Chantrelle jealous, and she makes ridiculous insinuations that I refuse to acknowledge out of respect for myself and dignity, generally. This happens during the few periods of the day when Chantrelle isn't sending these things called text messages, through that handheld space communicator device she uses. I cant figure out what powers the device, but I have reached an understanding that it has multiple capacities, and can meld seamlessly with other channels of communication in the next realm or two. I doubt that they are that powerful. What I enjoy about Giada is that her food is simple and the flavors are large and classic. And she comes strong with the cheese. I want to eat everything served in that kitchen. Here on Endor, we celebrate with extra cheese every night.

This was one of the easiest salads I have ever made, yet it is also the one I think about the most now, when my brain is successfully evading psychic vampires and vampire thoughts. I made it twice in one week. And I want some right now. Its fall, and Chantrelle and I are embarking on a tour of the fall foliage. The leaves will remind me of the color of the mushrooms, of Chantrelle's hair. Foliage is a dumb word and I don't like saying it. Its only a matter of time before I learn how to find the truffle here on Endor. I wished I might of engaged a bit more scholastically the subject of mycology, but I've not always harbored an impulse to forage for mushrooms. Forage, I will. But, I can't afford a micro pig. That, and it don't seem right. Because you could have a macro pig instead, and not a snotty bacon tease scampering round and biting ankles, and eating the Doritos that fall gracefully to the floor, the autumn leaves of nacho cheese. Respect.